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The alternative is to use real influence to inspire buy-in and commitment. To learn how the best-of-the-best do it, we conducted over extensive interviews with highly respected influencers from all Adult want hot sex Tanner Alabama 35671 of life for our recent book.

We found that great influencers follow a pattern of four steps that we can use.

An earlier post covered Step 1: Go for great outcomes. Here we cover Step 2: Listen past your blind spots.

To invite genuine buy-in and engagement, we need to listen with a strong personal motive to learn and understand. What we hear is easily distorted with our own Club swinger Strasbourg, biases, experiences and agenda, even when our intentions are good.

We often hear what others say without understanding what they mean. We hear what it means to us, not what it means to. They look preoccupied, and they usually are.

Problem-solving listeners listen in order to move things forward. If people want your solutions, this is the right approach. To master the art of Level Four Listening, resist the urge to defend yourself, Sexy women seeking casual sex Saginaw yourself, or offer quick fixes.

Instead, remember that you are listening to learn.

How do you feel. What do you think.

What was your first reaction when you heard? What else comes to mind?

To put Level 4 Listening into practice, consider these questions: Who has modeled Level Four Listening for you in your life? When do you find yourself most challenged to use Level 4 Listening?

With whom is it most important that you raise your level of listening?

Mark Goulston, M. John Ullmen, Ph.